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Rae's Journal Entry-

Journal Entry :February 28th

Testing my gut with initial interactions of some guys I work with.

A. Josh

Josh feels easygoing. Easy to talk to. That’s the first thing I noticed—and the thing I trust most. He doesn’t linger when he talks to me or scan the room while I’m answering. He listens, then moves on, like the conversation isn’t being judged.

There’s no performance there. No sense that he’s keeping score.

If I had to name the feeling, it would be calm. My shoulders don’t tense around him. I don’t replay anything afterward. He doesn’t register as a question, and I think that’s the point.

Truly good people rarely do.

B. Ron

Reliable. That’s the word that comes to mind. He shows up when he says he will. Remembers details. Makes things easier in small, quiet ways.

There’s comfort in that—but also weight.

I caught myself thinking how good he’d be to have on your side. And then, immediately, I wondered what the cost of that usefulness might be. That thought surprised me.

I don’t exactly distrust him. I just don’t want to feel like I owe him.

I’m putting a 'pin' on this thought of him.

C. Derek

He’s charming in a way that feels practiced, even if he doesn’t mean it to be. Conversations pick up speed around him—like things are already in motion before you decide whether you want to go along.

It was off-putting for reasons I can’t quite explain.

I noticed how easily people laugh when he talks. How quickly attention gathers. They seem immediately entranced. Still, when I walked away, I had the odd sense that I had, too, agreed to something without realizing it.

I don’t know what that means yet.

I just know I noticed.

D. Austin

Austin didn’t confuse me.

The second he looked at me, I knew exactly what he was. An asshole. A misogynist. Not because he said anything—he didn’t need to. He watches women with a strange authority when they enter a room, then expects them to adjust around him.

There’s no charm there. No attempt to soften the edges. Just confidence that assumes access.

I’ve met this type before. Different faces, same posture. Same impatience when things aren’t moving fast enough—or in the direction he wants.

I don’t like him....And I trust that instinct completely.

*Three of them left impressions I can’t quite place yet—some more than others. One of them didn’t bother hiding long enough to be misunderstood.

I’m not here to choose anything. I just want to see if my instincts recognize patterns before my mind catches up.

Unlike in the past.

Time will tell if I’m right.

I am Grateful for: Still trusting my gut even if I miss a few warnings. Practice makes progress! And my husband Rob and our kids. We have adjusted to this move so much faster than we did last time.

Thank you for stopping by and reading this.

This scene lives outside the book, as a moment of reflection—before anything is decided, before anything crosses a line.

If it made you think about your own instincts, even briefly, then it did what it was meant to do.

The story continues soon.

I’m grateful you’re here at the beginning.